Protecting Your Relationship While Planning A Wedding

Protecting your relationship while planning a wedding can be a challenging, journey. As a wife, mama, and wedding photographer, I can confidently say that the wedding planning process is one of the first real tests to any relationship. It can set the tone to how your wedding day feels and plays out for you. Scripture provides an abundance of wisdom to guide you through this season. Here, I will share how you can beat stress, stay excited, and maintain a strong connection with your fiancé. These are the same principles that I referenced throughout the planning process of my wedding and found to be transformative.

Pray Together

Navigating the wedding planning process is easier when you include prayer as a cornerstone. Reflect on the counsel given in Philippians 4:6, “In every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Praying with your soon-to-be spouse is an effective way to navigate the challenging path of planning your big day. It not only soothes the tension that might arise but also keeps your perspective aligned with what truly matters – the celebration of a divine covenant between you and your best friend.

During these prayer times, it’s crucial to lift up your concerns, hopes, and dreams for your wedding day. Allow this shared & spiritual time to become a safe space from the busyness of preparation. Through prayer, you’ll find a source of tranquility amidst the whirlwind of decision-making, reminding you both of the sacred commitment you’re about to make.

Beyond seeking divine intervention for the wedding plans, these moments of prayer can also be used to bless your future together, to pray for wisdom, understanding, patience, and a loving heart towards each other. This helps to reinforce the spiritual bond between you two, making your connection even stronger.

Praying together is a simple act, but it carries profound benefits. It brings you closer, calms your spirits, and realigns your focus. Remember, as you journey towards your wedding day, you’re not alone. God is with always with you but inviting Him into the planning process ensure His presence and blessings on your wedding day. This sets the tone of peace and love and starts your marriage off to a beautiful start.

Discuss & Agree on Finances Upfront

Deciding on a wedding budget upfront sets the framework for your subsequent choices. From wedding vendors to wedding dresses, stay on the same page. Draw from Proverbs 21:5, “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance…” and let this diligence begin with your financial planning. Sit down with your fiancé and openly discuss your expectations. Decide on your top priorities and what is most important to you both. Is it the location, food, photographer, entertainment, etc.? Knowing where you’re willing to splurge and where you can save can ease decision-making.

Agreeing on finances helps to avoid conflict down the line and adds clarity and direction to your planning. By maintaining open and honest communication, you can nurture your relationship while efficiently planning your dream wedding.

Know Your Personality Types and Discover Your Planning Styles

Differences in personality types and planning styles can often lead to unnecessary friction during the wedding planning process. As you embark on this journey together, it’s important to understand each other’s unique preferences and approaches. Maybe one of you is more detail-oriented, preferring to have a step-by-step plan, while the other tends to be more spontaneous and relaxed. Neither approach is wrong, they’re simply different.

Reflect on 1 Corinthians 12:4-6, “There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them…” Just as God created each of us uniquely, our planning styles too will be different. By understanding and respecting these differences, you can complement each other’s strengths and compensate for each other’s weaknesses. Protecting your relationship while planning a wedding is about teamwork, flexibility, and mutual respect. In doing so, you will not only ensure smoother wedding planning but also foster a deeper understanding of each other, strengthening your bond. Remember, the key is not in changing each other’s planning styles, but harmonizing them

There’s a good chance that your planning styles reflect how you tackle other areas of life. This is an excellent time to gain insights that will aid your relationship long past the wedding day. Learn where your strengths can complement each other – leading to a harmonious journey to the altar and beyond.

If you are unsure on you planning style, I have created a quiz to help you understand each other how you might prefer to plan your wedding. TAKE QUIZ HERE

Share Responsibilities

The excitement of wedding planning can quickly turn into stress if the burden falls heavily on one person. Scripture encourages us in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 by reminding us, “Two are better than one…for if they fall, one will lift up his companion.” Don’t let your future spouse carry the weight of wedding planning alone. Make it a team effort.

Deciding on responsibilities can be a simple conversation. Discuss your strengths, weaknesses, and areas of interest. Perhaps one of you has a knack for budgeting, while the other has a keen eye for design. Utilize these talents to divide and conquer your to-do list. Sharing responsibilities in this manner not only relieves pressure, but also introduces an element of enjoyment to the process.

Wedding planning can also serve as a sneak peek into how you both might handle responsibilities in your upcoming married life. The goal is not just to plan a beautiful wedding, but to cultivate a relationship that thrives on mutual support and teamwork.

However, it’s important to remember that sharing responsibilities doesn’t mean a fifty-fifty split of tasks. Protecting your relationship while planning a wedding is all about balance. Maybe a week comes where one of you takes on more because the other is swamped at work. Be flexible, be understanding, and communicate often.

Be each other’s support system, remember to take breaks, and celebrate your small victories together. Wedding planning is more than just a task; it’s a journey that you’re embarking on together. And just as in life, it’s easier when shared. Through this shared responsibility, you are not only preparing for a one-day event, but cultivating a habit of teamwork and mutual support that will serve your marriage well in the years to come.

Set Healthy Boundaries

In the never-ending agenda of wedding planning, it’s easy to let the process consume your every thought and moment. However, it’s important to establish boundaries for the sake of your relationship’s well-being.

Allotting specific time for wedding planning and setting aside time to simply be together, without discussing wedding details, can foster tranquility and prevent burnout. Let Colossians 3:15 be your guide: “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…and be thankful.”

Protecting your relationship while planning a wedding means establishing healthy boundaries from the pressures and opinions of others. You might encounter well-intentioned advice from friends and family, but it’s vital to remember that this is your special day. Respectfully communicate these boundaries to others to ensure your peace of mind and keep your wedding planning process joyous. Remember that these boundaries are not walls meant to isolate you two, but guidelines that promote balance and mutual respect. They protect your relationship, ensuring it remains the focal point

Ultimately, the objective is to create a serene and thankful atmosphere in your hearts and relationship. By instilling these boundaries, you will be able to maintain focus on what truly matters – the love you share and the lifelong commitment you are about to make to each other. With Christ at the heart of your relationship, these boundaries will serve as a protective shield, paving the way for a harmonious journey towards your wedding day and beyond.

Seek Godly Counsel

There may be moments when the wedding planning process can stir up confusion or even disagreements between you and your partner. In such instances, turning to godly counsel can be incredibly helpful. Reflect on Proverbs 15:22, which tells us, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed.” This scripture reminds us that seeking advice and guidance is not a sign of weakness, but a wise move that leads to success.

In this light, don’t hesitate to reach out to individuals who can offer spiritual direction and practical insights. Trusted leaders, mentors, or friends who can provide valuable biblical advice and share lessons from their own experiences. These people have walked the path you’re on and can provide perspective and solutions you may not have considered.

Seeking godly counsel is about inviting wisdom into your decision-making process and maintaining a godly perspective in your planning. It’s about ensuring that the stress of planning doesn’t overshadow the sacredness of the commitment you’re preparing to make.

Remember that guidance is a tool that can be utilized to resolve conflict, gain clarity, and navigate the complexities of planning a wedding. As you journey through this process, godly counsel serves as a lighthouse guiding you through any storms that may arise, directing you towards a successful and joyful wedding day.

Put Each Other First & Stay Connected

In the midst of planning your wedding, don’t lose sight of the bond you share with your partner. Protecting your relationship while planning a wedding requires open communication, mutual understanding, and maintaining a romantic spark. Reflect on the wisdom of Ecclesiastes 4:12, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” This cord symbolizes the unity between God, you, and your future spouse. Keep this trinity tightly woven through all your wedding planning stages by nourishing your connection, showing mutual respect, and prioritizing your love for each other.

Despite the hectic schedule and the avalanche of decisions to be made, make time for each other. Regularly check-in on each other’s emotions and concerns, support one another, and remember to keep your relationship fun and lively. Keep the flame of your love burning brightly even in the whirlwind of wedding preparation.

Remember, wedding planning is not just about organizing an event; it’s a shared journey, a memory in the making. So, enjoy this journey together, cherish these moments, and strengthen your bond. The love and unity you nurture now will not only lead to a beautiful wedding day but also set the stage for a fulfilling, godly marriage. Keep God at the heart of your journey, practice these steps, and you will successfully cultivate a strong, biblical relationship that is armored in Christ and ready to face the test of time and a long life together.

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